SHIFTING YOUR IDENTITY: THE POWER OF HOW YOU TALK ABOUT YOURSELF
When it comes to building new habits, most people focus on the what: what workout plan to follow, what meals to prep, what schedule to stick to. But one of the most overlooked parts of lasting change is the how — most specifically, how you talk about yourself.
Because words matter. Especially the words you repeat to yourself.
THE DEVIL’S IN THE DETAILS: SENTENCE STRUCTURE MATTERS
There’s a big difference between saying:
“I’m trying to exercise more.”
vs.
“I am a person who exercises.”
The first keeps the habit at arm’s length; it implies effort without identity. The second claims it as part of who you are. That shift in language changes the way your brain perceives the behavior. You’re not just trying anymore. You are.
Behavioral psychology shows us that identity-based habits are often more sustainable. Identity-based habits focus on creating a new identity, changing existing beliefs, and proving these things to yourself, rather than just focusing on outcomes. According to James Clear (author of Atomic Habits), “the key to building lasting habits is focusing on creating a new identity first. Your current behaviors are simply a reflection of your current identity. What you do now is a mirror image of the type of person you believe that you are (either consciously or subconsciously).”
Put another way, when your actions align with your identity, you’re more motivated to keep showing up — because it feels like you’re simply living in alignment with who you are, not forcing something extra into your day.
WHY START WITH IDENTITY?
Why not just start with action – with the outcome that you are looking for? This is a great question.
If you are trying to eat more color (fruits and veggies), you could absolutely just…start eating more colorful foods. But why? Why do you want to eat more color?
Do you just want to eat more vegetables? Probably not.
Do you want to feel healthier? Improve longevity? Increase the amount of nutrients that you are consuming? My guess is yes – and these are much deeper. It is this intrinsic motivation that shifts identities. Maybe you don’t have all the answers yet for “why,” and that’s okay. Chances are that these will evolve (and become even more powerful) over time.
To make sustainable, lasting change, there are many things that need to change. All of these, though, begin with your self-image and core beliefs.
**I challenge you to choose a statement that feels at least 80 - 90% believable to your brain. If it feels completely false, your brain will reject it. Start with something that feels like it’s almost true, and grow from there.**
PUTTING THIS INTO PRACTICE
1 | Choose one statement at a time.
Instead of spreading yourself thin across a dozen goals, pick one to anchor into your identity. For example:
“I am a water drinker.”
“I am someone who fuels my body with protein.”
“I am a person who prioritizes sleep.”
2 | Write it everywhere.
Everywhere – I’m not kidding! Repetition rewires the brain. Put your identity on a post-it on the coffee machine, your bathroom mirror, or your laptop that you’ll see every day. Save it as your phone wallpaper. Type it in your notes app. Use it as the weekly header in your planner. Text it to yourself. The more your brain sees it, the more it sticks.
3 | Use it frequently, especially in high-pressure moments.
Before you say yes/no to something, before you default to old habits, repeat your statement – even turn it into a question. For example:
Hitting snooze on your alarm? → “Does a person who moves my body first thing in the morning snooze their alarm?”
Ordering a second drink at happy hour? → “I am a person who respects the limits I’ve set around alcohol? Does this respect my boundary?”
It’s not always going to be perfect. It might feel inauthentic or silly to write or think or say these things to yourself. Stick with it; this repetition grounds (and guides) you in who you want to be.
Your habits don’t just come from discipline — they come from identity. When you change your language, you train your brain to see yourself differently. And when you see yourself differently, your actions follow.
So the next time you catch yourself saying, “I’m trying to…” or “I’m working on…” — stop and reframe. Say instead: “I am.”
YOUR NEXT STEP
Does this blog post resonate with you? At Front Porch Nutrition, I coach real people through real-life nutrition — thinking through what your wants, needs, and goals are, and working together to make changes that last not just in the moment, but for the long haul. Get started with 1:1 nutrition coaching today!
